How To Get Your Ex Back | WHO (2024)

If you have broken up with your boyfriend or girlfriend and you’re wondering whether you should get back with them – keep thinking!

Getting back with your ex isn’t always as simple as it may seem. On one hand, when the bells of unfinished business start ringing it might just be time to relight an old flame.

But you broke up with your ex in the first place, so what makes you think you won’t break up again? So if you’re wondering ‘should I get back with my ex’, well, here’s what we think.

1. TAKE A BREATHER

Whoo! The end of that relationship was hard work! Breaking up can be physically and mentally exhausting. You’ve made the decision to end things that were quickly going downhill and now you need some processing time. Sit back, relax and give yourself and your ex some space. Now is not the time to dive into a new relationship or rehash an old one. This blissful period is all about giant tubs of full-fat ice cream, midday rom-com marathons and the fresh perspective you create by keeping love, just for a little while, at a healthy arm’s length.

2. WORK ON YOU

Ah, the joys of self-care! There’s only one person who claims the spotlight in step two and that person is you! Delete tinder and bumble, take a social media detox and learn to be your own best friend.

Letting this phase linger for at least a few weeks is a good rule of thumb; you need time readjust to single life. Now is a great time to let your hair down and have some fun with family and friends. You should also be starting to think about what your wants and needs are when it comes love.

3. CAN IT BE?

There’s very little point in stressing out over a past relationship that isn’t meant for a second chance. The first thing that you should be asking right now is if a redo is even possible. Being single is a major criteria for this one. While it may hurt if your ex has already moved on with someone else, it’s better to find this out now

A new partner is a pretty classic indicator that your ex just isn’t interested anymore. Ouch! This sting should make step three your last one! On the other hand, if your ex does seem keen make things work, step four is right around the corner.

4. ASSESS DEALBREAKERS

Every relationship ends for a reason which means that you don’t want to go exactly back to the way things were. Right now, it’s important to start sifting through red flags and dealbreakers so that old issues don’t repeat themselves.

What were the dramas that caused you and your ex to part ways? Could you tolerate these quirks in the future? If re-coupling is a bad idea, it should become pretty clear when you start to answer these questions.

5. TEST THE WATERS

Congratulations! Your former partner could soon be current once more! Second time’s a charm so, if you’re sure you’re heart’s in the right place and you’re interested for all of the right reasons, go ahead and get in touch! Hopefully, your ex will feel the same way.

6. EASY DOES IT

Whoohoo, you did it! A happy relationship is well and truly on the cards as you re-enter the honeymoon phase . Take things slow and remember the mistakes that caused things to fall apart last time.

Step six is your relationship beta test so make it count! Enjoy the opportunity to have new experiences and a second first date. Slow and steady wins the race so there’s no need to rush through this comfortable bliss.

7. KEEP IT CHATTY

Communication is the keyword to a great relationship! It’s in both of your best interest to maintain an open dialogue, talking over issues and working together to correct the big ones. Conversations don’t have to be super scary and serious but they should establish trust. Chit chat ’til you’re heart’s content!

8. MAKE IT COUNT

Every experience is an opportunity to learn something so make your recent break up matter! Whether the split came down to a big mix up, a tricky long distance situation or something else entirely, you can use this to avoid repeating old mistakes. Get your builder’s hat on and start fixing the broken bits from last time as you build a much steadier foundation for round two.

9. MIRROR, MIRROR

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the most loved up of them all? Step nine is about reflection. Was getting back together the right thing to do? What steps could you take to make this relationship even better? Now is the time to assess where this thing is going and if you like the look of the destination. Mending old love is tough so make sure that it’s worth it!

10. HAPPILY EVER AFTER

There are two possible versions of this story’s end. The first one sees you and your significant other in a healthy, happy place, all loved up and making romance look easy.

The second one sees you both realising that there are a few too many differences to find middle ground and deciding it’s time to part ways for good. Together or apart, an amazing future lies ahead for you both.

Relationship re-dos are hard work and still popular! The Duke and duch*ess of Cambridge, Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth, Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard, Pink and Carey Hart, all broke up, got back together and have stayed together!

If your ex-love is still burning bright, don’t be scared to approach with caution and give things another go!